Big Brother’s accents


So tonight we have the vote off between Welsh Laura and Yorkshire’s Chanelle. I’m not fussed which one goes; they’re both unlikeable. One self-deluded and miserable; the other needy, clingy and self-deluded. But what I will miss will be the accents. Is it just me or are the south wales and yorks accents just about the worst going and strangely compelling?

Look I was born in Manchester and the manc accent is pretty grim. All that Sunshiiiine is hard to bear. Thankfully I lived near Blackpool as a kid so I probably sound more scouse than manc. And scouse is bad enough. But I went to uni in wales and that S Wales accent is as grating as can be. Who on earth says ‘Look you’ like that? And when you link the accent to a real fish wife like Laura it’s just so unpleasant. Unn it?

But the prize for crap accent goes to the bunny boiler. Who christens their child Chanelle anyway? In a Wakefield trailer park it must have sounded so cool. Uumm. That bloody girl obsesses about her bloody Zeggeh, will he still luv me tomarrah? Don’t think so love. She complains that the only reason she’s become unliked is because she’s been ‘parly’. yeh right luv. And as the eviction time has neared she’s become more neurotic and child-like. The relationship with Zeggeh has deteriorated (big shock). Even he wants her out. Let’s hope she stays in and the welsh wangers gets voted out – just to make pretty boy’s life a nightmare. Laura will be famous for 5 minutes in the rhondda nightclubs. Chanelle will have 10 minutes and will end up modelling underwear for a while. Don’t think Laura will but she could make the Sunday Sport this weekend.

But fact is tonight we lose a crap accent to keep me amused. Things won’t be the same in the house again. Unless they install someone from Dudloy!

pp

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About Paul

Having decided on a change of life by moving home from the UK to Italy, this is the story and thoughts of a man on a personal journey from the Blackpool Tower to the Leaning Tower of Pisa, in search of la dolce vita. After several olive harvests he's now back in London but en route he shares his very personal perspectives on life.

3 thoughts on “Big Brother’s accents

  1. yeh i know it’s me commenting on my own stuff but i get my desired outcome; wangers out and chanelle stays. plus new hot girl joining. ziggy already looks like a rutting stag. should be (more) tears before bedtime. orr zeggeh, yer doe luv meh dern’t yer? yes love like the plague.

    incidentally some guys who worked for me were staying in some hotel in sheffield and were asked if for first course they’d like ‘soap or froat joase’. they had to ask 4 times before they understood what she was on about. it’s troe.
    pp

  2. Hey PP

    Think you may have missed a trick here – Fat Sam enters the BB house, full of dry Black Country humour! And it’s not on the BBC either.

    CC

  3. hey cc

    you’re right; that’s a brilliant way to link my football and BB lines together – and far more plausible than Sven succumbing to the wiles of Charley. Or is it?
    Either way, great idea.

    mind you i bet sam’s already thinking he’s entered a place full of prima donnas, tantrums, bitching cliques and which bears no relation to any sense of reality. that’s just the players’ car park at NUFC.

    pp

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