it’s not a dogs life

I heard about another girl this morning who’s been savaged by a pit bull terrier; one of these terrifying animals that locks its jaws onto its ‘prey’. Does this sound familiar? It should do because in the last year in the UK there have been around 3400 cases of people being hospitalised after being attacked by dogs. That’s virtually 10 cases a day, ever day. What’s more it represents a 25% increase in such cases over the last 5 years. So if my maths is correct it’s increasing at the rate of one new savaging every 2 days. Is it just me or wasn’t the Dangerous Dogs Act introduced to staunch this problem? If so, it isn’t working.

Maybe the new Home Secretary Jacqui Smith could address this once and for all with some tough legislation that prescribes ownership of any dogs that could be termed dangerous. If that captures Boxers and the like as well as all these pitbull and staffordshire bull terriers and dobermanns etc so be it in my view. They are all liable to turn and cause terrible injury or even death. I’m not just being sensationalist because of the news. Our own daughter R was once harrassed by some yapping dog when she was just a toddler and now she has a phobia about all dogs. She will pass out with fear if a dog even tries to sniff her.

I’m not against dogs per se – I just happen to feel anti the concept of pets to be perfectly honest. I love animals but think they should be farmed humanely or left in their natural habitat. Domestication of animals just feels wrong to me though I can see that it’s too late to return dogs and cats to the wild. But exotic creatures should never be cooped in a box or cage in someone’s flat in Dudley. It’s just wrong. There’s lots that I hate about domesticated cats and dogs:

– cats kill garden birds and other wildlife at an alarming rate

– somebody’s cat craps every day in the big pot by our front door holding our beautiful bay tree – a real helpful selling feature for the house.

– dog crap is everywhere. I get regularly and heavily fined for being two minutes late with my meter payments or forgetting the congestion charge or parking 6 inches over a yellow line. But when was the last time someone was actually fined for allowing their pets to foul the places where I walk and where kids play? I’ve never known anybody hit for such an offence and it’s a disgusting, disease-ridden problem.

– Cruft’s. It is the animal-owning equivalent of Joseph; an entertainment for people who cannot socialise with other human beings.

– Peter Purves. Hosts BBC coverage of Cruft’s and seems to throughly enjoy it. Try women Peter.

– clothes for animals. Mother nature was really smart and gave cats and dogs fur as a perfectly natural protection. It works. Now don’t go quoting chihuahuas at me which have no fur. I guess that’s because Mother nature figured that the Mexican climate would make the need for fur unnecessary. But that’s where she expected the bloody things to remain – and not in bloody Mexborough.

– dogs that slobber and salivate uncontrollably. Disgusting.

– people who kiss dogs on the lips especially the ones that slobber and salivate uncontrollably. Just stomach-wrenching.

– people who kiss slobbery dogs then kiss other people. Should be made to parade naked at Crufts.

– cat and dog hair on furniture etc. Revolting.

– little dogs that yap uncontrollably. In fact any dogs that cause a noise nuisance should be removed from their owners.

– people who attribute human feelings etc to their pets like in some Walt Disney animation.

– breeding traits in or out of dogs for show purposes – pekinese for example. To me that is a crime against nature.

– docking of tails. Ditto

– dog and cat names. Often hysterically funny by being so unfortunate.

– dog and cat food. Mmmm.

– dog breath. Nice.

– long-haired Alsations. Archetypal pub dog and my particular bete noir.

– poodles with their stupid hair cut

– cats and dogs that lick themselves when you’re having lunch

– dogs that run their bottoms over the grass to get relief from some awful complaint

– worms – I could go on but enough said?

Now I know many, many won’t agree with me including family members and friends. I’ve come across a lot of pets which are/were simply beautiful and affectionate animals. But at the end of the day I could never escape the feeling that such beautiful creatures were being held against their basic will. Sorry if that upsets some of you. But I get upset when I hear that one of these animals has turned ‘for no good reason’ and bitten off some child’s face. Because there is a good reason – it had reacted against its unnatural environment. Instinct took over from training.

So come on Home Secretary make all animal management including pet ownership a licensed arrangement that is strictly controlled and given only to those who you can reasonably trust to do the job responsibly with major enforced penalties for dog fouling, inhumane treatment and so on. Please.

But you won’t because you’ll fear that pet owners will not vote for you. Well they might you know. I think real decent caring pet owners will be accepting. Just like car owners accept the road fund tax, the price of petrol, congestion charging, parking meters, motorway tolling. We don’t like it but can just about see the need for it in a civilised society. But only just…


This entry was posted in is it just me... and tagged , , , by Paul. Bookmark the permalink.

About Paul

Having decided on a change of life by moving home from the UK to Italy, this is the story and thoughts of a man on a personal journey from the Blackpool Tower to the Leaning Tower of Pisa, in search of la dolce vita. After several olive harvests he's now back in London but en route he shares his very personal perspectives on life.

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