It’s hard to get through to any serious commentary on the Mourinho/Chelsea situation because of all the female gnashing over the departure of the hottest guy ever to grace the screens of MoTD. Everywhere you turn are women eulogizing about his gorgeousness. I saw some stuff on GMTV this morning which made me blush. I don’t know who the old bird was they had on the couch but she was positively orgasmic in her breathy descriptions of the guy. They brought on some male models in 3 of his classic outfits – the track suit (she quite liked that), the Armani suit (she was squirming now) and finally the grey winter coat and scarf (yes, yes, yes Jose!). Steady girl. Yesterday morning on straight-laced Victoria Derbyshire’s phone-in show on Radio 5, one woman caller, when asked to relate her favourite Mourinho memory, just drawled hotly ‘he’s just so dirrrty.’ Even Victoria giggled and in her deepest slow voice simply offered us ‘oh i know’ and left it hanging there for a few seconds. Just the silence of women imaging how dirty he could be…..oh Jose.
Hello. Back to reality ladies. Just for you I thought I’d do a list of the top 10 great looking football managers of all time.
1. Jose Mourinho (obviously)
2. Roberto Mancini (just google his name and check him out girls, great hair eh!)
3. Ruud Gullitt the dreadlocks did it
4. Cesar Luis Menotti (manager Argentina 1978 W. Has anybody smoked cigarettes better than this guy?)
5. Marcello Lippi (accordingly to Alex Ferguson, ‘so good-looking he makes the rest of us look like Bela Lugosi’)
6. Johann Cruyff. And not a bad footballer
7. Franz Beckenbauer, the Kaiser. Elegance and dignity personified.
8. Frank Rijkaard . More dreadlocks but dresses as coolly as Mourinho
9. Sven-Goran Erikkson. Look I’m struggling and his track record suggests he’s got something women like.
10. Roy Keane. Maybe a stretch but starting to cultivate the stubble, great clothes and cool detached look of the hottie Jose.
What do you think ladies?
Not too many Englishmen but they do feature strongly in the totally unsexy bottom 10:
1. Ian Dowie
2. Sir Alf Ramsey
3. Fat Phil Scolari
4. Big Sam Allardyce
5. Little Sammy Lee
6. Steve McLaren
7 Bob Paisley
8 Joe Fagan
9 Jack Charlton
10. Jim Smith
But this is a posting for the girls so to finish off, how about a top 10 great looking footballers list
1 Georgie Best, the king
2 David Beckham
3. Christiano Ronaldo
4. Francesco ‘the hottie’ Totti
6. Thierry Henry. Sulky bugger but undeniable va va voom
7. Mario Kempes. For those who like the long-haired 70’s look.
8. Paulo Maldini
9. Gary Lineker – apparently it’s the legs and the salt and pepper hair
10. Peter Beardsley – just to make the rest of us feel a bit better girls.
Not too many dirrrty comments please girls. Unless you feel you need to.