Well I’ve done a number of postings about Sir Cliff. I have to say that I find him to be a self-absorbed little man with a fascination about his own looks. A modern-day Narcissus if ever there was one. He’s also incredibly successful at what he does and I acknowledge he has a huge of base of adoring fans – most of whom are middle-aged women. But I can’t help but comment on his preening and his self-obsessionism. And here’s a staggering conclusion; if he’s not gay I’ll drink my swimming pool dry. Don’t misunderstand me, he’s perfectly entitled to a private life and I don’t care what he does with consenting adults in his own home. Being gay is absolutely something to be proud of. But I’m always enraged by his obfuscation over the subject and by the many women who rush to his defence whenever I say something like this and by their denial over his probable sexuality. I suspect I know why Cliff doesn’t come out – he’s afraid that army of women fans will disown him and his earning capacity will decrease massively. Down to the last £100m are we Cliff and what, too graspingly money-grubbing to be honest for once?
Anyway this week he’s gone and blown it I suspect (leave it). He’s just launched his autobiography in the UK – My Life, My Way – and it’s being serialised in the Daily Express I believe. How appropriate for his audience. Needing a headline-grabbing tag (heaven’s above he likes tall speakers so he must need the sales), he’s let it be known that he’s sick to death of media speculation about his sexuality. So why not clarify it Sir C? Instead he’s let slip that in his autobiography he’s admitted that after living with a man (his manager) for many years he now lives with his companion, former Catholic priest, John McElynn who he met in New York in 2001. Apparently after meeting Sir C John took a sabbatical from the church, as you do.
There’s nothing in this statement to suggest that Sir C is homosexual you understand. He’s gone as far as to say that even if he was, he’s sure his many fans wouldn’t care and would understand. I think that’s as close as it’s going to get in coded entertainment speak for I am gay but daren’t admit it for fear that book sales’ revenue will peak at £2.5M rather than the £5M my publishers have promised me.
I don’t care; I really don’t. But i couldn’t help but smile at the news that yesterday he was signing books in Asda, Spondon near Derby for 850 housewives. He’s as rich as Croesus for frig’s sake. No doubt he’ll tell us it’s all about giving something back to his fans. Yeh right Cliff. Just a bit more juice to pay for the monkey gland injections after the botox failed eh…
Anyway here’s a vid of Sir C doing his classic serenade of the Wimbledon audience that fateful day when it rained. A few observations:
– what is he wearing?
– how many gay female tennis players does it take to make a backing section?
– did I ever tell you C and I were guests in the Royal box a couple of years ago?
– check out the look on Joanna Lumley’s partner’s face. Just priceless.
– did I ever tell you we invited Joanna to a BT/Tate event but she couldn’t make it. However she left me just the most polite, considered and breathlessly sexy telephone message explaining why. As rejections go, that was as good as it gets. She is truly lovely. I did record it but wild horses wouldn’t get me to play it.
Just watch Cliff at Wimb in the rain. Come on girls, don’t you get the Bachelor Boy reference yet……? I bet the priest has been All Shook Up for years.