location, location, location

Well it’s been a couple of days since I had a bit of a rant so I’d better make amends or folks will think I’ve shed the grumpiness. I haven’t really don’t a posting yet on our recent move to Teddington. We love it here; it’s got everything we want as  a location to stay when we’re in the UK – closeness to one daughter and son-in-law (and others on the way hopefully), access to some fine shops, great transport links into C London, closeness to C’s workplace, fabulous location between the Thames and ancient Bushey park, some great restaurants and bars and a friendly villagey atmosphere. In fact everything that Buckingham wasn’t. The only thing I dislike about it is that it is the capital city for junk mail. We get bloody tons of it popped through the letterbox virtually everyday. This lot arrived just this morning:

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The Who? Factor

Well we now know the last 3 finalists on the X Factor as Danyl became the last of the also-rans to leave the show last night. I wasn’t unhappy to see him go because a) only a pretentious prat would put up with spelling his name like that, b) he reminds me of that other dufus Darius who appeared on one of these reality talent shows and who was equally obsessed with his own talent c) I can’t stand it when a simple lyric like the word ‘love’ is stretched out to over 6 undulating notes and Danyl was a serial offender of that horrible Mariah Carey style of warbling. But I digress. This posting’s not about him nor about the X Factor. Instead I came across the winners of another tv reality talent show this morning; they are Beardsmith (honestly) who won GMTV’s recent competition to find Britain’s No 1 (musical) Family. Never heard of it/them? Well it’s a contest only open to family members and I have to tell you that the talent on display makes the X Factor auditionees seem like The 3 Tenors. I was thinking what a waste of valuable TV time but then again GMTV give Lorraine Kelly an hour’s airtime each morning so…. Continue reading

roy of the ravers

I read this morning that the Fulham manager Roy Hodgson is bigging up the talents of his striker (!) Bobby Zamora after he scored his 6th goal of the season to beat the less-than-mighty Sunderland 1-0 yesterday. Zamora’s goal was a well-placed clean header which must have startled his manager because the striker has perfected the art of  hitting shots off his knees, shins and backside. Indeed so wayward is his sense of the exact location of the opposition goal that home fans from Brighton, Spurs,West Ham and Fulham have become used to singing the Zamora tribute chant, ‘When you’re sat in row Z and the ball hits your head – that’s Zamora’ to the tune of ‘Amore’. Clearly still dazed at the post-match press conference, Hodgson stunned a room of football hacks by claiming that his centre-forward might well deserve a call-up to the England team’s World Cup squad as a viable alternative to the less-technically gifted (!!) first-choice striker Emile Heskey. By all accounts Hodgson has now been booked to appear at the Comedy Store for an extended run, whilst the Italian-born England head coach Fabio Capello was later quoted as saying that ‘Itsa bin a bellisimo week; primo Eengland were seeded for da World Cup draw and were tutta fortunata to be placed in a Grouppa which gives us  a realistico chance of, how you say, progressing to the later stages of the tournamento. Then a fellow Italian won Sono uno Celebritti – bravo Gino! And now I haf a seen mio primo pantomima horse double act – signori Hodgson and Zamora. Life in Eengland is tutta jolly!

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Strictly X Factor Celebrity

Well here we are, after what seems like an eternity the finals of the 3 big TV programmes are upon us, and I can’t believe I haven’t written a word on the subjects of Strictly Come Dancing, X factor and I’m  a Celebrity GMOOH, before now. Never in the field of blogging has there been so much to say about such little talent that’s gone unsaid. Ah well, better late than never. Continue reading

tiger feet…of clay!

Well I’ve so many things to write about and seemingly no time in recent weeks to get some postings done. So I’ve decided to have another splurge of pre-Xmas blogging. A couple of years ago I did 50 postings in the month of December which was great fun but I hardly saw my wife and family.  I’m not going to attempt to do that many again but I will try and catch up a bit; maybe one a day is a bit more realistic. The first subject up is Tiger Woods. Wo ho what a story eh. The golden boy, the paragon of virtue, the world’s most iconic sportsman, the greatest golfer there has ever been, the highest earner in world sport, the untouchable Tiger is…banging cocktail waitresses and his car into a tree and a fire hydrant (unable to choose between a wood and an iron no doubt) whilst being clubbed by his irate missus. Such fun.

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