Ah look at these two old mates. One’s a tiny little fellah with a rather shallow personality, squeaky voice, a magic wand, and a fluffy partner who struggles to talk coherently. And the other’s Sooty. Boom boom.
Sadly that friendship was tested yesterday with the news that the diminutive magician Paul Daniels was hospitalised after being hit in the face by a pizza flung by kiddies favourite Sooty. You couldn’t make it up could you? I’m not sure whether charming Paul’s going to press charges for GBH (Giardiniera Bothers Head no doubt) but don’t you think, whatever the supposed injury, this is one story that he shouldn’t have sought to publicise. I mean how hard does this make him look? Forced to seek medical care after being attacked by a doughy base with mozzarella topping flung by a glove puppet isn’t exactly acting like the Terminator is it? I can’t see HRH awarding him the George medal for conspicuous bravery in the face of Sweep’s little friend.
Regular readers will know that I have a special place in my heart for a growing little band of showbiz poisonalities like Bruce Forsyth, Kerry Katona, Richard Madeley, John Barrowman, Vanessa Feltz, Barbara Windsor to name but a few, who I’d happily consign to a convict ship full of serial perverts, for crimes against humility, humour and even ham acting. But the little illusionist Daniels has just promoted himself to the undisputed leader of the twat pack for his bravura display of valour whilst threatenned by a quatro stagioni. What a frigging Marguerita.
pp
Pasta Paulie 
Top Tip:
SOOTY, a man hole cover is the perfect replacement for pizza if Piers Morgan ever appears on your show.
ha! However I fear Russ that if the Commons select committee on Culture, Media and Sport can’t entice Pistol Piers back to the UK to answer a few simple questions then the bookers on the Sooty show might have a job on their hands. Still I like the proposal enormously. keep on checking in R
pp