Oh come on nurse, it can’t be that bad, can it?
Yes I had my appointment with the lovely doctor Charlotte yesterday armed with her flexible sigmoidoscopy camera (any new readers unsure as to the focal point of the not-so-nice Nikon should check out my earlier posting
but steal yourself for some blunt medical info). Anyway for any poor souls who may be following the saga I thought you’d appreciate a medical bulletin. Firstly some great news – I’ve got lots of vivid, graphic pictures of my colonic passages to share with you…only joking dear readers. How was the experience? Well the staff were brilliant but the enema was draining and the probe was, um, something I’m just glad is over. It wasn’t the funniest 25 minutes of my life but I’ll spare those of a nervous disposition the details.
But the point was to get to the bottom of my recent stomach problem (could have phrased that better) which necessitated my recent spell in hospital. The good news is that I don’t have the condition diverticulitis which everyone thought I had and for which I ingested huge quantities of antibiotics. A nice side-effect of those is that I’ve got just about the most glorious bacteria-free sludge tubes seen in an endoscopy unit. However Charlotte did uncover one small section of my otherwise pristine bowel which is inflamed and nasty looking. At this stage it’s not clear what it might be so she has taken enough samples of the tissues to allow a decent biopsy to be undertaken and for her to discuss the results and likely remedial action with some colleagues, which will all take a few days of course. I should hear more next week and I’ve been assured that it’s highly unlikely I’ll drop down dead before then. Phew!
So that’s all good then. Well if not all good, at least we’re narrowing down what the problem is so I’m pleased with that and I think my family are a little reassured by the news.
So look out for next week’s thrilling installment of Carry On Up the Colon. Oh please yourself nurse!