Ministry of Uncool

My posting seems to be having a brainstorm so here’s trying again. I’ve just about seen it all now; my eyes are streaming, my sides have split and I’ve almost been rendered speechless. I have to thank my lovely daughter Ems and top son-in-law St who came over yesterday for lunch and showed me this little video tweet that has stormed twitter world. Or should that be twat land? It features my favourite Secretary of State for Duplicity. Can you guess who it is yet?

We open to a street scene in gritty Westminster and we see a middle-aged man, pasty-faced yet red-cheeked, casually vaulting over a concrete wall. He comes to a landed halt, a little out of breath and sends us these words…

‘Great to try a bit of #parkour this morning’

Why it’s only little Matt Hancock in dinky shorts and pumps stood next to a guy who happens to be Sebastian Foucan, President of Parkour UK. And who also happens to be black, because I’m sure Matt appreciates that BLM of course and it looks good to get down with the kids in da ‘hood, innit, bro’.  Matt says how cool Parkour is and Sebastien just looks at him and says ‘Anyone can do it’ with a resigned look on his face, knowing that his next 3 words …’even this fuckwit’…will be deleted out by the edit team. Because this was professionally filmed and put together with split screen layout and slo-mo action. And the final credits make clear it was not a selfie film but produced by the Department for Digital, Culture, Media and Sport no less. In other words tax payers’ money attempting to make Matt Hancock look and sound as street cred as Ruff Sqwad. I’m only surprised he didn’t clench his leather-clad fist in the air and drop to the knee.

It’s just the most cringeworthy little bit of Brent-Partridge Hancockery you’ll ever see. Enough babble enjoy…


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About Paul

Having decided on a change of life by moving home from the UK to Italy, this is the story and thoughts of a man on a personal journey from the Blackpool Tower to the Leaning Tower of Pisa, in search of la dolce vita. After several olive harvests he's now back in London but en route he shares his very personal perspectives on life.

5 thoughts on “Ministry of Uncool

  1. Do you listen to Dead Ringers on Radio 4 ? Hancock is described as like the kid who stares at you on the bus ☺

    • Hi L

      I love Dead Ringers but tend to catch it on the iplayer these days so am a bit behind. I think the staring kid on the bus analogy is so clever. Hancock’s dead eyes are almost Picasso-like. Far smarter than my crude descriptors!

      Thanks for stopping by as ever. Stay safe


  2. Love the white ankle socks. You’d think he would at least have wore some no-shows. Maybe his new trademark to go with the pink tie(s) he always wears.

    BTW Paul. Purple Bricks, the official estate agent of Team GB. What’s that about. Give us your take?

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