April showers-free

So almost everything in our lives has been simplified these last few years. And I think that is no more clear than in my dress sense. I simply wear black these days – black t-shirts and cover tops, black leggings, socks, pants, shoe, coat and scarf. Everything else in my life has been shed – suits, shirts, jeans, ties and definitely anything colourful. My wardrobe is so easy and slim to manage now. The only time I change from this format is when I change from wearing leggings to shorts (black or v dark grey) in the summer with short socks and my only concession to colour, my Converse trainers. Boring eh. The reason I’m telling you this is that I made the change to shorts a few days ago. And of course the weather has turned overcast and wet since then so you can blame me for the inclement conditions. Ha! (btw leggings are back on today, hopefully temporarily).

But it’s the April weather scene which is possibly more intriguing than my black sock collection. I read today that this month has been the frostiest April in 60 years. When I get my morning paper at 6.30am I can vouch for that. It’s been really chilly in the mornings and at night. At the same time it’s been gloriously sunny during the day running at 135% sunshine compared with the normal monthly average. On top of that it’s been one of the top 5 driest Aprils since 1862 with just 19% of the expected average rainfall. So one of the frostiest, sunniest and driest of Aprils since records began – until I put my shorts on of course. Sorry to wreck the Met Office records.

Now to conclude this posting I thought I’d tell you about a posting I wrote several years ago. I think it was about a Vodaphone tv advert which featured a catchy little ditty about April Showers which I think featured in a Disney film from the 40’s – maybe Bambi. I wrote a piece about it headlined April Showers and it attracted one of the highest viewing responses I’ve ever had from a single posting. I mean it was in the 1000’s. I was going to do loads more postings on Disney soundtracks until I saw a comment from one disappointed viewer who described how pissed off he was (ironically) that I’d written about something as bland as a manky British tv ad rather than his favourite porn character who specialised in a form of gratification involving a certain type of golden shower. I’ll let you figure it out.

Hence the deliberate adjustment to the headline. I wonder if I still get a few weirdo visitors assuming that her porn channel’s now non-chargeable!


ps had my second jab today woo hoo.


6 thoughts on “April showers-free

  1. You have given Men in Black a new vision for me – I can now only see Will Smith and Tommy Lee Jones in black t-shirt and shorts with knobbly knees, 16 pack and hairless!! Quite traumatic really, especially first thing in the morning.
    Although the weather here has been dry and sunny (apart from yesterday), it hasn’t been warm enough for that lovely leap into shorts quite yet, but I’m sure it’s not far off – although the walking shoes have been replaced by trainers (Sadder than you though as mine are Karrimor, but they are a colourful red/blue)
    Glad you are settling into your new Stratford home

    • Hi Phil

      Great to hear from you and hope all’s well. I’ve seen you in shorts mate – 3 years playing footie for Aber Uni. Great legs. Hell of a goalie too. Weather’s still crap here. Sorry everyone.


    • Ha! 4 seasons in every day up there I believe mate. Shorts are back in the drawer I’m afraid. Premature celebration was always one of my problems!

      Stay well Al


  2. “Leggings” Paul. Really leggings? hmmm
    Trousers, bottoms, track-suit pants – yes.
    Is this an attempt at gender neutrality?
    Unlike Phil above, for me, it wasn’t the MIB image irrevocably damaged by you, it was the ghastly mental image of you in LuLu Lemon leggings, one size too small mate… oh dear

    And the title went over my head 🙂

    • Actually mate I wear the leggings because they hug every curve of my muscular legs and bulging lower torso and I get lots of eyes from the old girls on the tills at M&S. What can I say? The ladies love it. Ha!

      Just joking – I think they’re actually called slim-fit training joggers but leggings sounds more economical.

      Showers-free? It’s because April was one of the driest on record. Sorry to be so cryptic…

      Stay well oh humourless one! ‘Scuse the English spelling


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