alan green

Is it just me or is Alan Green, Radio 5 Live’s, footie commentator an annoying prick? I’ve just listenned to his radio commentary on the Man U v Man City match and it sounded like a poor match. But AG just can’t stop himself from expressing his views about how crap everything is; the match, the standard of play, the attitude of the players, the ability of the players, the standard of refereeing (his particular favourite),the tactical acumen of the managers, team selection, state of the pitch, the weather, the chanting, the political situation in the Middle East. Shut up with your whinging and just focus on what’s happening. He has to bloody comment on everything and it’s always negative. Is he married? What must his poor wife put up with at meal times? The peas are under-prepared, the potatoes are cold, the chops are too tough, the balance of carbohydrates and proteins is all wrong, the wine is just too old. SHUT UP!

Then there’s that laugh of his, an explosive cackle, that’s just a bit too forced. And he always laughs at people not with them. And what’s more I can’t stand his falsely-chummy happy-chappy style when talking to callers on 6.06. He just loves people paying him compliments, coming over all coy of course, but when they criticise him or his views, oh boy does he come across all indignant. Snappy little man syndrome.

Whatever happened to the classic BBC commentary style of the insightful thought, telling point of view, the wit, the sheer passion and the occasional silences to let the atmosphere speak for itself? Ever heard the expression, less is more, Green? And he’s got too much hair for a man his age. That’s what really rankles…..

PP