Look I thought the opening ceremony of the Commonwealth Games, which seemed to receive universal praise, was a bit celtic inscrutable; i just couldn’t tell where the irony and self-deprecation stopped and the Scottish whimsy took over. But at least it was a hoot. I’ve been watching the closing ceremony for over an hour now and it’s been as much fun as a colonoscopy. Lots of tents (there’s that irony bit – got it, but no midges? because there sure were the only frigging time we camped in Scotland – and rain) and Lulu singing Shout (groan) and Deacon Blue singing something awful then some diddly dee singers then 40 minutes of crap speeches and a tourist advert for Australia’s Gold Coast, ya big gallah. It has been as much fun as a big jobbie in the Commonwealth Games pool. I’ll give it 10 more minutes and if Kylie isn’t on singing Can’t Get You Out of My Head in something very slinky and skimpy, I’m off down Sauchiehall St and heading south to C4.