to see you…painful

I’ve just been listening to Jimmy Tarbuck on Richard Bacon’s late night radio 2 show, praising BBC’s major star Bruce Forsyth and celebrating his 80th birthday tomorrow. Apparently he’s famous for something like 15 catch-phrases which the BBC regard as worthy of particular tribute.

Wow 15!! in 60 years of performance. It’s a staggering canon of work to rival Richard Dimbleby, Sir David Attenborough and Kenneth Clarke. Sigh.

It’s not a very gracious thing to admit but I hate all these old school, golf-playing, variety club ‘funny’ men like Forsyth, Tarbuck, Corbett etc. They just aren’t funny. They sing (badly), tap dance a bit (grim), tell some lame jokes that have been scripted for them and present crap programmes. None of these 3, and there are dozens more, have ever, ever made me so much as chuckle. I can’t watch Ricky Gervais for 2 minutes without corpsing. Is it just me or does anybody else think that these so called entertainers should be banned from performing on national TV once they reach pensionable age? If the BBC are so obsessed with drawing from the well beyond that then let them create an Old Gits channel on BBC65. Make Brucie (and who would want to be called that? ) head buffalo and dump all that Strictly F*cking Awful, Any Wet Dream Will Do, Touchyourwood, The One and Lonely etc on it. Alternatively let’s have a programme dedicated to ‘outing’ the syrups of the rich and famous. Brucie, Terry, Reggie, Gary, Tony etc could be secretly filmed lifting the ‘piece’ from the bald pate and exposing their vanity for general mocking. We could call it ‘Nice to see it (bald head at last); to see it, not very nice’ or ‘Play your rugs right’.

Now that would be nice to see…



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